The Mountains and the Desert

I woke up early in San Francisco because I had a decision to make and a long drive either way.  I was heading back to Las Vegas because I'm flying home Wednesday night.  I had to decide if I was going to go through the San Joaquin Valley or through Yosemite National Park and the Sierra Nevada Mountains.  The mountain route would surely bring me to a significantly higher elevation than I was at in Flagstaff.  

When I say I had a decision to make I meant I was obviously, 100%, going through the mountains.  I had to see Yosemite.  I just needed to decide where to stop for breakfast and gas.  Was I risking my life?  Maybe.

I left San Francisco just before 8 am ready to take the longest (620 miles) and highest drive I've ever planned.  Courtney's playlist seemed just right.  Suzanne Vega sang Tom's Diner as San Francisco faded from my rearview mirror, and it was perfect.  Heyward, CA seemed like a good town to leave quickly. As I was filling up a guy in a pickup truck screamed through the parking lot and peeled out as he exited the parking lot.  It was one of those gasmarts where the clerk was behind bulletproof glass.  I gassed up, bought a Choco Taco for breakfast, locked the doors, and listened to Geto Boys, just like in Office Space.

In the second verse of Damn It Feels Good to Be a Gangsta, Bushwick Bill got all philosophical on me and had me thinkin'.  He raised a fundamentally important question that we should all give serious consideration and thought to, "when the shit jumps off what the fuck you gonna do?"  I know what I'm about, I know what I'm gonna do, so y'all better know too, cause this world is chaotic and it ain't got mercy for fools.

At some point today I wanted to listen to Jay Z and Justin Timberlake because people back in Boston having been going bananas over the shows at Fenway Park.  Apparently, it was the hottest ticket of the summer.  I passed a sign for Murphy Road in Escalon, CA.

Between Oakdale and Tulloch Lake I saw a sign saying "speed enforced by aircraft".  I was trying to go as fast as reasonably possible to shorten the drive as best I could.  I looked to the sky and it seemed clear, so if Uncle Sam was going to get my by drone strike, so be it, I would accept that fate, I would take those odds.  It was 1030 am on a Monday morning in the summer, how many drones could possibly be over Central California right now?

I filled up at the Miner's Mart and grabbed a few aspirin to thin my blood a little in preparation for the high altitude I'd be in for the next few hours.

Soon I passed California's oldest saloon in Groveland, the Iron Door Saloon at 3100 feet in Yosemite Gold Country.  I find that claim to be highly questionable, am I right?

A Smoky the Bear sign informed me that the fire danger today was "extreme".

I paid $20 to get a pass for Yosemite and proceeded on route 120 through the park.  I queued up the entire catalog of the Zac Brown Band, including their live album Pass the Jar, because I wanted to put something on that was downloaded on my phone and would keep the airwaves occupied, hopefully, for the entire ride through Yosemite because there were steep cliffs and winding roads that required my undivided attention.  The elevation rose quickly to 5600 feet.

As it climbed even higher to 6200 feet, Zac Brown sang "But's there's no tomorrow/Not for everyone", and I sure hoped they'd be one for me, but I think the point he was making is don't use harsh words because they could end up being the last words someone hears.  I saw Zac Brown Band at Meadowbrook last month, by Lake Winnipesaukee, with Tommy.  Rain soaked the crowd for a few songs as we hid in the beer tent.

When Zac sang "when she loves me I'm on top of the world", I felt lonely.  Then the loneliness quickly subsided when I got my first glimpse of Half Dome as Zac Brown sang, "Quiet your mind/Soak it all in /It's a game you can't win/Enjoy the ride",  I did that, I did exactly that.  

Half Dome

Yosemite is a natural wonder.  Life on earth evolved because millions of years ago the conditions were just right for life to begin, and survive.  Our existence is a result of the perfect combination of circumstances and conditions, so we're all pretty lucky.  You're even luckier if you get to witness the natural beauty of Yosemite National Park.  No digital photographs can capture the awe of this place.  I took some photos for the memories.  I tried to not let the moment pass and lived inside Yosemite for a few hours.

El Capitan

Yosemite Valley from Tunnel View. El Capitan on left, Half Dome at center.

On my way out the east side of the park, and by on the way out I mean a dangerous 50 mile drive on twisty, narrow roads along steep cliffs, I stopped at Tenaya Lake, which was around 8100 feet.  I hiked to the shore knowing that if my body failed me in this moment that this lake could become my grave because I hadn't had cell reception for hours and there was nothing nearby.  It seemed worth it though.

Approaching Tenaya Lake

On the sand I kicked off my flops and dipped my feet.  The water was cool and refreshing and it felt good.  There were some other people doing the same thing and a couple of kayakers.

The elevation continued to climb and topped out at 10,000 feet exiting Yosemite at Tioga Pass.

I drove through Inyo National Forest, basically, by myself, gnawing on beef jerky because that was all I had to eat and and I was pretty hungry and there was nothing around for hundreds of miles.

Mono Lake

Driving through the mountains and the desert was cool, until it wasn't.  After Yosemite, I still had about 330 miles to Vegas.  I had a good view of the desert and the mountains but the wide-open space was so enormous that I felt small, isolated, and forgotten.  I hadn't had reception for hours and there was almost nobody else on the road, so I felt alone, shutoff, and disconnected.

These dips were like a not fun roller coaster.

I was welcomed back to civilization by a text from my buddy Weapon as I passed the Shady Lady Ranch, a brothel.  Prostitution is legal in Nevada.  I'd be lying if I said stopping didn't cross my mind, but I didn't, and I'd never do that because I'm too romantic.

About fifty miles outside Vegas the amount of bugs that were splattering on the windshield was unbelievable.  When I started to see the metro area of Las Vegas I felt relieved.  Before I began this trip I thought of Vegas as a been-there-done-that type of place.  Now that I was again seeking refuge in Las Vegas I fully grasped the history of the city as a stopover for weary pioneers going west or north.

I came here years ago for a bachelor party and overlooked the essential nature of Vegas.  I saw Vegas as a place to party, not as a sanctuary.  Now, after staggering back from Flagstaff last week and trekking through the Sierra Nevada mountains and the Mojave Desert today, Las Vegas is my temple.

Last night I was so tired from driving 13 hours that I ate dinner at 10 pm and then went to bed.  I saw the wonder of Yosemite and conquered the mountains.  I feel triumphant in the dust of high summer.  Now, I want to celebrate so I'm going to get a frozen drink by the pool.  The temperature is in the low 100s here and and the heat is so intense, even at 2000 feet, that whenever I'm walking outside I have to fight the urge to duck.  Check out these lovebirds that I was walking behind last night on the way to my room.

Yeah her hand is in his pocket, deal with it