Big Evergreen Sky

With a calming view of Lake Union I didn't mind waking up early in Seattle again.  Before leaving I wanted to see the Black Sun sculpture in Volunteer Park near the Seattle Asian Museum.

I took I-90 East to sounds of my Seattle playlist.


I-90 is the longest interstate highway in the United States stretching from Seattle to Boston, and it would take us through through Spokane, Washington's second largest city.  Washington is nicknamed the Evergreen State and the drive 50-100 miles from Seattle is impressively green, with tress covering the Cascades.

We stopped for a pit stop in the vicinity of Keechelus Lake and the song playing in the gasmart struck me as being awesome.  It was The Band Perry - Chainsaw.  The other thing that struck me was the pride of the woman working there to keep things in spotless condition.

Once we entered the Colombia River Basin the trees disappeared and the hay fields began, and my allergies went bananas.  And my neck was sore, so the 500 mile drive to Missoula was already miserable for me, and the sad, angry grunge music was making things worse, so I needed a change in audio input.  One song from the Seattle playlist really hit me in the right way - Death Cab for Cutie's Transatlanticism.  I was introduced to this beautiful song by the morning TV show at school, the instrumental part plays on the three minute countdown on Wednesday or Thursday.  When Ben Gibbard sang,

The distance is quite simply much too far for me to row
It seems farther than ever before 
I need you so much closer

I felt the same way, exactly.  Although he was probably thinking about a woman when he wrote those lyrics, I was thinking about today's destination Missoula, Montana.  Either way, we connected, so much so that I called the event the Evergreen State Mind Meld.

When we stopped in George, Washington...think about that for a second...two different dudes noticed my USA soccer jersey.  One said 'I like your jersey" and the other said "Hey U-S-A".  My first World Cup memory is returning home from a trip to Ireland in 1994 and seeing that USA '94 dog everywhere driving home from the airport.  Since 2002, I've loved the World Cup, it's one of my top two favorite sporting events.  I've predicted Brazil for this year.

Haunted for 64 years by the disappointment of 1950, #worldcup2014 will be a story of redemption. Brazil wins⚽️ pic.twitter.com/cIn5ReFexw
— Dan Murphy (@DanMurphyTweets) June 12, 2014

Crossing the Colombia River was pretty epic.  I pulled off for a scenic view after crossing on the Vantage Bridge.  

Colombia River

Before we reached Spokane we made a stop in Sprague, WA.  I bought some cheese popcorn and dropped a donation into the bucket next to the register for a local fallen soldier.

The popcorn made my fingers turn nuclear orange and I dropped surprisingly little on myself as I ate and drove.  Anyone who has ever been on a movie date with me knows that I'm a ranked popcorn spiller.  I'll get up at the end of a movie and there'll be mounds with the equivalent of a small size popcorn surrounding me.  Can't worry about that though.

It began to rain hard as we entered the forested Spokane County, but it didn't last very long, so we passed through Spokane and entered a 70 mile stretch of I-90 through Idaho.  After passing through the beautiful Coeur d'Alene area, I cut through the Idaho Panhandle National Forest and out of Idaho.

Entering Montana marked the 40th state I've visited and I've been excited to see the Big Sky state.  Big clouds is about all I've seen up there so far though.  For the final leg to Missoula I needed to get seriously boosted so I put on my Blue Flames playlist, which is mostly my favorite EDM tracks.


We arrived in Missoula around 730 with the sound of M83's epic song Oblivion on blast.  We checked into the motel and then went to eat dinner at Dickie's BBQ.  I chowed down on a pulled pork sandwich, bbq beans, and fresh cut and fried waffle fries.  With a full belly, I went straight to bed because I was exhausted.

In the morning we went to Walmart because I needed a bag strap.  I also picked up some University of Montana gear, which has the same colors as Lowell High, and I saw the purrfect 4th of July t shirt for my buddy Collins.

On the drive to Helena today I listened to The Band Perry's album with Chainsaw on it.  It was pretty good, but I was unmoved.  We stopped at the Continental Divide at MacDonald Pass, 6,444 feet.

From there we listened to the playlist I made for Ganno's wedding, and I noticed my mother tapping along to Schoolboy Q's Man of the Year.  I rolled into the state capital of Montana pondering one of life's great questions - turn down for what?


We ate lunch at Bert and Ernie's Saloon and Grill and they were setting up for their 40th anniversary block party.  I foolishly ordered Irish nachos.

I wish I knew how to quit you

Approaching Helena we started to see signs for the Testicle Festival (testyfesty.com).  It's a big party - outdoor food and music.  Evidently, it has three big contests - wet t shirt, ball eating, and big ball contest.  I'd be nuts not to come back for this at the end of July.  

So, I've spent the last two days mostly driving to get here.  I'm weary from the road, so I'll spend this evening mentally and physically preparing for the jewel of this road trip, Yellowstone National Park.

Here's what it looks like to drive through Montana, part of the road I nicknamed, Miner's Road, because it looks like it was paved in gold, and blood.    

Testicle Festival billboard

Miner's Road

Fire Walk with Me

Going With the Flow

Ladies  from Tinder were blowing up my phone all night, so I actually had to enable the "do not disturb" mode for the first time, ever.  I woke up at 530 am because it felt normal.  After losing part of yesterday's blog post I grunted and growled around the room, then finally finished it and went to breakfast.

We were picked up at the hotel at 930 by Terry from Shutter Tours.  We were first and Terry welcomed us onboard.  The three of us chit-chatted on the way to pick up the other tour guests.  Terry is a photographer and he asked me about my equipment and degree of skill.  I admitted that I was a complete novice, but when he said 85% of photography is having an eye for it, I didn't hesitate to claim that I had a natural eye for photography and that I was just working on the last 15%.  It seemed important to establish that I was a know-it-all masshole from Boston early to maintain the stereotype.  I didn't want anybody on west coast thinking we'd lost our edge and gotten soft.  

Terry is a good guy and knows a ton about photography and Seattle, so I don't think he held it against me.  His personal stories sounded more exciting than Seattle history because he casually dropped lines like "when I was in Thailand photographing bats".  I was grateful for all the photography tips throughout the day.

Driving through downtown Seattle Terry pointed out the Escala building, Christian Grey's residence in Fifty Shades of Grey, and I was the only person on the bus to admit reading it.  What I thought was most interesting was that E.L. James wrote the book without ever having visited Seattle.  She used Google Maps to find locations for her story.  Yes, the lack of authenticity does bother me, but it's still one of the three most influential books I've ever read.  

Crossing Lake Washington we could see Mt. Rainier and the sight of it blew me away.  It looked fake, like it was a set piece for Game of Thrones that might have Jon Snow standing on top.  Mt. Rainier, the jewel of the Cascade mountain range, is only about 50 miles southeast of Seattle and 14,411 feet high.  Seattle is at sea level (0 feet) and 50 miles away Mt. Rainier peaks at over 14,000 feet - that is astonishing geography.   

Our first stop was Snoqualmie Falls, which is nestled into in the foothills of the Cascades about forty minutes outside the city.  Snoqualmie Falls, at 268 feet, is higher than Niagara Falls (173 feet).  

Strong, mighty, relentless, majestic, glistening...oh and there's a little waterfall too.

As we drove back I learned tons of things abut Seattle.  It is the largest city in America named after a single Native American, Chief Seattle.  And here's a short list of companies headquartered in Seattle:

Boeing

Costco

Starbucks

Amazon

Microsoft

We drove past Kurt Cobain's bench and last residence, Jimi Hendrix and Kenny G's neighborhoods, and a studio where Pearl Jam, Soundgarden, and Alice in Chains recorded.  The next stop was at the Fremont Bridge.

Troll Children

Next we headed for the Ballard Locks.  The locks serve multiple purposes, but, as Terry talked, what I found most interesting was the life of Pacific salmon.  Salmon are born in fresh water and migrate to the ocean.  When the time is right they return to their birthplace to spawn.  Salmon are guided by an incredible memory, they can remember drops of waters from everywhere they've ever been.  When they return to fresh water they never eat again, despite their sometimes months-long upstream battle ahead, and their bodies begin to mutate.  Then, upon reaching their birthplace, they lay their eggs, and with burdens lifted they can rest easy because after spawning, salmon die.  The circle is complete, and the ultimate sacrifice is paid so that life may continue.  It has always been my favorite fish, but today I understood on a new level because I felt the struggle and nobility of the Pacific Salmon.  I was moved by a connection with a fish.  The purpose of life is to keep it going and our duty is to find a way to help.    

Getting lifted

A beautiful little fool

The last stop was Queen Anne Hill for a stunning view of Seattle and Puget Sound.

Kerry Park

For dinner I went across the street to Daniel's Broiler, which overlooks Lake Union, so I sat outside on the deck and contemplated boat life while enjoying more of Seattle's awesome food.  I had oysters, scallops wrapped in bacon, and key lime pie.  My mother satisfied her craving for salmon and had the best mango sorbet I've ever tasted for dessert.    

Key lime pie

Night settles over Lake Union

    

Seattle's Meat Market

We left Lowell with my brother John just after 430 a.m.  After checking in and going through security we got coffee at Starbucks, to get in the Seattle mood.  Just when everyday seemed to greet me with a smile, I was nearly not allowed to board because of my supplemental oxygen concentrator.  The flight took off at 700 and at 625 I was positive I would not be allowed on with my machine and I was planning how to break the news to my mother.  I was in grace and favor of the Starbucks gods today because my doctor happened to be the doctor on call and was able to email the woman harassing me at the boarding gate and satisfy her.  So as the plane separated from earth and carried us, I was aware of the slim odds of things working out just right so I was thankful that life had smiled upon me.

I decide to bring my mother to accompany me on this trip.  She has never been to the west coast or seen the Rocky Mountains.  So, I'll allow it, since it's a short trip.

Boston

I entertained myself on the plane by reading a Chuck Klosterman book, listening to Tiesto and Lana Del Rey's new albums, and using my iPad map to spot geographical features out the northern facing window - I followed some specific bends in the Missouri River in Montana and identified Flathead Lake.

Halfway through the flight the little oxygen machine's button panel lit up like the 4th of July and shut down - I was like - oh shit.  The air quality on planes is notoriously bad and the cabin pressure is equivalent to about 7500-8000 feet above sea level.  My lungs can't handle that, so I quietly tried to figure out what to do as my mother was fake sleeping next to me.  The correct procedure was obviously take it out of it's carry bag, lay it across my lap, and stroke it, like a baby.

As I sat there with it, I noticed that it seemed very hot and probably overheated, so hopefully it just needed to cool down.  I leaned over to my mother, who's a nurse, and asked at what oxygen saturation  should I ask the cabin crew to deploy the oxygen masks.  She said 80 and we both hoped that didn't have to happen.    

I got down to 86 (if you don't know, normal oxygen saturation is above 95-96%).  After a little while I felt a little shake on my lap.  Had the oxygen machine woken up from it's mid-morning nap?  I pressed the power button and it putt-putt-putted into action so once again the day, and potentially my life, had been saved. 

My oxygen machine

I picked up a white Camry and headed to downtown Seattle to get some lunch.  Pike Place farmers market seemed like the most touristy thing to do, so we headed there.  Seattle is a very hilly city, it reminded me of San Francisco.

Pike Place is a disgusting place for tourists to buy junk.  I was only interested in the food so I just kept walking and eventually found Maximillen's and sat outside on the patio.  The view of Puget Sound was awesome.  I didn't really mind the wait for the food because it was good.  We both had the halibut.  We headed to check-in at the hotel after lunch.

Lowell will always be with me

View from Maximillian's deck

People in Seattle love peas.

Line to get in the 2nd Starbucks. Not Joking.

The most interesting, weird, and unbelievable thing about Seattle is that so many people here seem recognizable, not celebrities, almost just like people I know - the waiter at at the other table at lunch, the woman on the street, the couple in line - it's strange.  Everywhere I turn I see someone that looks similar to someone I know, but I don't know any of them.  Seattle is a city of ghosts and shadows - it's freaking me out.  And amusing me.      

Upon reaching our hotel, the fatigue set in.  I was dragging.  I've been feeling under the weather for like a week, so I needed a rest.  I got back in time to see Greece break the hearts of Ivory Coast in the World Cup and hear the talk about the Suarez biting incident. 

I'm so tired that I have to bail on the Sox game tonight, which is a bummer.  Forget the money, I need to be able to survive this trip, but it stinks.  My body is telling me it would take too much energy to go to the game, and if my body is talking to me, I have to listen.  High altitude does not agree with me, so I have to be careful and conserve my energy.  I'm a little nervous not being 100%, but you can't be afraid, that's no way to go through life.  Even when it seems like I fell on black days, you can't quit.  Giving up is the antithesis of life, when it gets hard, you just have to find a way.  So, that's what I'll do.

Did I spend my afternoon lying around whining about the Red Sox game?  No, of course not.  I've been resting and conducting a social experiment.  I downloaded Tinder and threw my self into the Seattle's romantic meat market.  I created a new profile and went fishing for some Tinderonis.  I have no intention on meeting any of these babes, if I get any, this is for science.  

Before I get to the results of this experiment, let's take a moment to acknowledge my romantic conundrum.  My mind is constantly waging an internal struggle between my wants and needs.  My Aries sun sign loves freedom and adventure and smelling all the flowers.  Opposing that, is my moon sign, Libra, which has a strong desire for partnership.  It's an eternal battle, so I suit up in my armor everyday knowing there's a chance that I may come upon the one who is connected with her goddess spirit and can enchant the warrior god.  

I swiped right (yes) on everyone that appeared, I didn't even look sometimes, just swiped, and swiped, and swiped.  Here's what I learned over the course of about three hours.

1. If you want to live in a city with good food, coffee, beer, and cheese and a seemingly endless supply of hot babes, consider Seattle.  

2. I melted down the Tinder app and it froze my phone.  I had to delete it and reinstall it.  Dodged a bullet because I didn't lose any data.

3. I got 25 matches in 3 hours.

4. Ashley, who unsurprisingly looks vaguely like someone I know, started a chat with "you're super cute".  I didn't reply.  Remember, this is for science.  

5. In Seattle, apparently, I have a type.  Here'a are the general pattern of the Seattle babes who dig me.  Between 24-38, likely have a tattoo, probably enjoy "beer" and "fun", may have a facial piercing, a little out of shape but likes the outdoors, has a dog, not the most attractive in their group of  friends, and there's a decent chance that she's showing off her "coffee makes me poop" mug in a profile picture.  Pretty eye-opening stuff.  Time to reevaluate things.  

   

Balcony view over Lake Union. My mother's friend Julie hooked it up.

After dinner I conducted phase 2.  I asked one of two questions or both.  The questions were:
1. What are your thoughts on Massachusetts?
2. Do you have any post-apocalyptic skills I should know about?

I asked one of those questions, sometimes both, didn't clarify anything or respond, and waited for answers.

Highlights of question #1 responses:

-Melissa wrote:
Other than it's in Boston I don't think I have many.  My mom is unable to say it, ends up sounding like mass of two shits. I would like to go there, I hear it's nice :)

-Bess:
It's home to the worst nfl team

-Jessica:
I love it there!

-Amanda:
Initial thoughts:
Went to Boston once in the middle of winter...loved it.
Good Will Hunting.
Salem witch trials.
Cream pie.
Jimmy Fallon Boston teens.

-Jessica:
Um...

-Polly:
Aside from the drivers I love it

-Esther:
It hasn't been a topic on which I've officially formed thoughts

Marissa:
Boston, chowda, and the Kennedys

-Joanna:
Ummm never been there.  Why? Are we going? ;)

-Rebecca:
Well, I've never been there but afraid that once I visit I'll fall in love with Boston.

-Jackie:
I never really thought about Massachusetts

-Erin:
It's a state lol

-Stephanie:
I rarely think about Massachusetts.  I'm ind of a history buff, so sometimes I consider it with the revolutionary war.

Highlights from questions #2:

-Maile:
Cat-like reflexes and I have a spidey sense

-Polly:
I can build a fire
I am a great team leader

-Jenny:
Um what makes you think that way

-Erin:
I can fish and I also have a dingo. She can climb trees. She is a good hunter. ;)

-Ashlee:
I can garden and cook and come from a hunting family

-Sarah:
Well... I took a Facebook test and it said I could personally take on 24 zombie biebers... So that's something.

-Rachel:
I'm pretty scrappy and crafty. Plus I don't know what kind of apocalypse you're envisioning so I am hesitant to divulge too much.

-Kimberly:
My family is from South Dakota, so we like to drink cheep[sic] beer and shoot guns!  Usually shoot a 12-20 gauge depending on what's around.  Not the best at target shooting.

-Stephanie:
My skill sets serve me well in this world, but I will be the first to die!

My Top 11 Taylor Swift Songs

I was drawn to Taylor Swift because she is a seeker of truth, and I find her honest and reckless approach endearing.  What follows is a list of my favorite Taylor Swift songs.  Why 11?  Because when I picture the number 11, I imagine Taylor and me side by side.

11. Innocent
On a tenderness scale, this song is a filet mignon.  This song truly demonstrates Taylor's forgiving and optimistic Sagittarius nature.  She looks for the best in people, and she isn't afraid to shoot a few sharp arrows of truth.

Most nostalgic line: Wasn't it easier in your lunchbox days

Most optimistic and hopeful line: Your string of lights is still bright to me 

10 I Almost Do
How many times have we given in to those urges to call or text someone we know we shouldn't?  I can remember every single one of the times that's happened to me because it's never happened to me. Exactly zero.  The tenderness, longing, and desperation in Taylor's voice on this song make me want to drunk dial her.

Most heart-melting lines:
And I confess, babe 
That in my dreams you're touching my face 

9. Teardrops on My Guitar
This song is about that person who doesn't notice you and your secret romantic feelings for them.  I can't relate to this song because I take what I want, but I can empathize and that's what makes this song special to me - how Taylor tests my emotional limits.

Most heart-breaking line: I wonder if he knows he's all I think about

8. Change
An uplifting song about faith and perseverance.  Stick with it.

Most Zen line: These things will change

7. Forever & Always (piano version)

The heartbreak of a collapsing relationship - the hurt, the disillusion, the flood of bittersweet memories.

Most emasculating line: Did I say something way too honest that made you run and hide like a scared little boy

6. Sparks Fly
The excitement and rush of a new experience.

Sexiest command: Drop everything now!

5. Treacherous
The intensity of this song bristles like a smoldering desire for a forbidden fruit.  The irresistible siren call of the wild beast.

Most mind-bending line: I can't decide if it's a choice

4. Haunted
If you're not singing about your pain then you don't know anything about music and you're doing it wrong.

Most haunting line: The whole time I'm wishing he was you

3. Begin Again
The mind is like a puddle, when it's disrupted, it becomes cloudy.  After enough time passes and the dirt settles, it becomes clear once again.  That's where love happens, in puddles, so the next time you step in one remember how lucky you are.

Most hopeful lines:
I've been spending the last 8 months 
Thinking all love ever does is break and burn and end
But on a Wednesday in a cafe, I watched it begin again

2. All Too Well
The heart needs time to heal, and when it does painful memories fade like an old t shirt.  Maybe that's what the healing is, forgetting.

Favorite lines:

'Cause here we are again in the middle of the night
We're dancing in the kitchen in the refrigerator light 

1. Long Live
Life is about sharing time with people and connecting, making sweet memories and sharing wonderful moments.  Long live, indeed.

Line that gets me amped:
When they gave us our trophies 
And we held them up for our town

Also:
When they point to the pictures 
Please tell them my name
Tell them how the crowds went wild
Tell them how I hope they shine

Should've Said No
This song didn't quite make my list, but this performance in a breakaway hoodie followed by the singing in the rain, on a scale of 1 to 10, is a 69, and a half.

Tuxedo Recommendations

Life is about making choices and the choices people make this prom season will separate the men from the boys.  My moon in Libra is an advantage in situations requiring style and elegance, so, each year, I save a few lambs from the slaughter.


Follow these recommendations for a classic, timeless look that will make you stand out in a crowd.  And if you don't think this looks awesome, then you don't know anything about high fashion.  

If I could do it all over again I'd go with the white jacket

So, this prom season, help the ones you love look dashing - do this exactly:

Jacket – White jacket for a bold, head-turning look, or black jacket for standard elegance.  A black jacket will look handsome and classic, just not striking.  White jacket is recommended.  

Lapel type – Peaked is recommended
Shawl is also looks good.  Notched is your last choice if all the cool guys got there before you, and you’re probably better off wearing your dad’s suit.

Shirt 

Collar - Laydown or Wing tip (whatever works best for you).  Do NOT get a       banded collar, unless you want to look ridiculous.   

Cuffs – French-cuffed shirts are an absolute must.  Additionally, you’ll need classy cufflinks, nothing goofy or clumsy – keep them sophisticated and simple.  Leave the dollar sign and Transformers cufflinks at home.  And absolutely no animals, you savage.      

Neckwear – Black Bow Tie is strongly recommended

Ties are popular but are not nearly as classy as the bow tie for a formal occasion.  If you want to be a part of the herd - get a tie, if you want to stand out – get a bow tie.  Extremely formal occasions are rare, so you should take advantage and wear a bow tie.  Remember ties are common, people wear them to work, and away games.

Cumberbun or Vests - Try both, but pick one or the other.

Pants – black, standard.  White jacket and white pants will make you like a gangster in a leisure suit – you don’t want that.          

Shoes – the pointier the better.  Pointed shoes are elegant.  All black.  Leather looks better than vinyl, but leather is more expensive.  Any black pointed-toe shoe will be fine.  Go as pointy as you’re comfortable with.  Squared and rounded-toe shoes are for going to work.  

Additional tips:

Matching colors with your date is unnecessary, and could potentially make you look like a clown.  Black and white goes with everything.    

The sooner you go to pick out your tux the more choices will be available.